About Opposites

To oppress enjoyment through seriousness based on:

1. staying in a single location
2. order
3. general knowledge
4. loneliness.

The daily anniversary of the start of another day.

It is generally not celebrated whatsoever and is met with much huffing and puffing, especially on weekdays.

A brass instrument whose musical pitch can be altered by sliding part of it backwards and forward to change its length.

Made famous in the theme tune to 'Johnny Briggs'

A place to get stressed and tolerate nature inside your own house.

An insect dungeon is a small darkened room containing free roaming insects. A light occasionally flashes for upto 2 seconds to show occupants where the insects are.

It is also possible to have Snake, Bat, Wolf and Bear dungeons.

Footwear designed to facilitate sporting physical activities.

A place that you pay to visit in search of culture and enjoyment.

A communication device that makes it inconvenient to communicate by completely interrupting what you're currently doing.

The device has 2 large iron wheels. The left wheel is for vowels and the right wheel is for consonants.

Hand-held device into which the innumerate may input numbers and operators in order to be provided with an answer without the worry, or even a basic understanding of, the process by which it was calculated.

A long piece of cloth worn around the neck to make one look smart.

A person widely known in their community for their stupidity.

A very large inconvenient way to provide associates with your contact details.

Business placards must, according to EU directives, be larger than 1.2m x 1.6m and have a wooden baton or handle extending no less than 1m from their shortest edge.

The minimum text size on a business placard is 7 cm high. The text must comprise, as a minimum:

1. Full name
2. Telephone number

To provide a portable source of light that runs on electricity - sometimes up to as much as a million candles worth.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hNjIEcb6-_M

Items of clothing worn on the feet to allow comfortable, relatively slow, self-propulsion between 2 or more points

A substance used to fill holes in people's bodies.

A volcano is a large, solid formation of earth of typically conical shape which spews out hot, liquid rock from the center of the earth.

A huge and inconvenient way to store information and move it from place to place.
Although information stored is kept safe, it is not clear how it is transferred to computers due to USB incompatibility.

Users have also reported difficulty getting Elephants to fit in their macs.

To provide information for free.

Saves lives

To cover your legs and keep them warm.

mechanical device that attaches to a garden hose for watering lawn or garden

A blizzard is a shapeless collection floating gasses that spews cold, solid water down from the sky.

takes hours to paste on your wall to make it look nice

To swallowing without chewing for survival with no lasting flavour.

A holder that is meant to be a safe place for keeping money but, recently has tended to have a track record for losing your money. Also, much too big to fit in your pocket.

To make sure tables and bars get wet with beer.

See Spoof...

http://www.warwick.ac.uk/~phscz/misc/spoof.html#contributed

To mark text or images in order to draw attention to them.

a totally unstimulating experience

To break things apart in an opaque way.

Create distress through seriousness base on:

1. Meetings
2. Strict procedure
3. Well know facts
4. Ending relationships

Credit to www.oppo-site.com/users/murdoch84